Navigating school breaks, especially during Thanksgiving, can pose challenges for children. Some of the challenges can include disrupted routines and unfamiliar environments. These challenges may trigger unwanted behaviors in both children and adults. Here are four essential behavioral insights on how you can be proactive to help mitigate these behaviors over the course of Thanksgiving break.
There are numerous proactive approaches you can take over Thanksgiving break to help minimize unwanted behaviors that may stem from various factors, known or unknown. Some ways to be proactive are creating routine and structure, designating a safe space, preparing for change, and offering choices. These proactive strategies serve as general guidelines to assist you in navigating Thanksgiving break more smoothly therefore it is important to understand that these strategies may not work for every child. If your child is exhibiting more severe behaviors, is it important to seek out professional supports. While understanding these strategies, it is crucial to assess and consider your child’s individual needs during this period for a more effective approach.

1. Create Routine and Structure
Maintaining familiar routines as much as possible and creating structure during unstructured times is a crucial support for children, especially over the holidays. When on a break, often their typical daily routine is disrupted. This can include, but is not limited to, sleep schedule, eating schedule, activity schedule, and those the child encounters throughout the day. Consistency within a child’s day can provide comfort and stability with understanding and knowing what is happening next. Environmental variables may have a direct impact on your child’s behaviors. By keeping consistency and structure within your days over Thanksgiving breaks, you can help reduce the likelihood of disruptive behavior occurring.
2. Designate a Safe Space
The holiday break might feel more intense for some children due to various factors like having more people around, being in new environments, and/ or being around a larger crowd or people. Before you attend or host a holiday gathering with family or friends, talk with your child to dedicate a safe place for them to when they are feeling overwhelming and needing some time alone or a quiet are to regulate. That space can be a room, a walk outside together, or any quiet area that is assessable the environment you will be in. Bringing a few comforting items or activities for your child to engage in during those times that may feel overwhelming, and they are needing space may be beneficial. Additionally, encourage communication and build in connection by practicing ways to signal the need to take a break or utilize a quiet area. This could involve using a code word, seeking your attention, or them asking you for help in another area of the environment to then communicate their needs privately. Anticipating their needs by providing them space or a break prior to the intense feelings of being overwhelmed could be beneficial in reducing the likelihood of unwanted behaviors or the child losing control over their own emotions.
3. Foster Flexibility
Life can unfold in many ways, sometimes unexpected even if we feel like we figured it out. Sometimes it unfolds in ways that aren’t always east to handle—like their favorite cousin no longer attending, family members becoming sick, or sudden changes in locations. These shifts can be particularly challenging for both children and adults, especially in times of stress. If you aim to see flexibility in your child over the holiday break, modeling flexibility for them is crucial. Children learn from observing and imitating those in around them. By modeling flexibility and responding to changes in unexpected situations, you are teaching your child valuable life skills.
One effective way to foster flexibility over Thanksgiving break is through modeling. Expressing the emotion in the moment and showing curiosity on how problem solving the situation together can be beneficial (for instance, saying “I feel disappointed that Oliver won’t be here for Thanksgiving, I wonder what alternatives we can do together instead?”). Taking a proactive approach with modeling flexibility may help capture your child’s attention, providing teachable moments before the potential of unwanted behaviors occurring, such as meltdowns due to unexpected changes.
4. Offer Choices
Finally, providing choices is another essential proactive strategy that can help decrease your stress over the holidays. During times of change or periods of uncertainty, such as holiday breaks, children will often seek control over their environment where they can. This could look like refusal or resistance to complete instructions you may give them. Offering choices allows you, as the parent, to remain in control over the situation while fostering your child’s growth as they learn autonomy and self-management skills during challenging times.
There are various ways to offer choices within your day over the holiday break. For instance, when cleaning before company arrives, provide them with 2-3 different tasks and ask which one they would like to complete. While setting the table together, asking them if they’d like to put out the plates or lay down the napkins. Additionally, if you have multiple activities planned to keep structure outside of electronic time, giving them the choice on which activity they would like to complete first. There is an array of opportunities throughout the day to empower your children through choice-making—choices could be as simple as letting them choose the color of the cup they’d like to drink out of.

Proactive strategies are incredibly beneficial, when practiced consistency and when understanding the specific needs of your child. They are not only help reduce the likelihood of undesired behaviors but teach your child valuable life skills. Take a few moments to brainstorm ahead of time ways you can implement additional structure and routine, establish a designated safe space, fostering flexibility, and choices you can offer your child over this Thanksgiving break. Ask yourself, “How can I individualize these strategies to fit the needs of my child?”
Remember, these are only a few general proactive strategies you could try. If you’d like to explore more specific approaches to help teach your child valuable skills in place of undesired behaviors, check out our parent coaching services for further guidance and individualized support.
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